Anyone that knows me, knows that I am notorious for making lists. There are lists curated on a weekly basis: grocery lists, Christmas gift ideas, New Year resolutions, things to pay off, photography ideas, but the most important of all my lists is the one that I keep of all the things that I want to accomplish in my life. Written on line paper in an old journal are my dreams laid out to be crossed off: Have babies, Live in New York City, Have an apartment at the beach, Earn BA degree, Become a photographer, Read more books, Marry my soul mate, Live in another country and learn how to play the piano. This weekend I got myself a MUSIC BOX and now its time to play her. I suppose its also time to make another list… I have always had this strong pull to do things, its never been about anyone pressuring me, its just this need that I have within myself. Sometimes it can be the biggest burden on my heart because once I do something, I find myself searching for whats next. I often wonder, is it an issue with contentment or is it just purely whats meant for me? When these lists are made… they won’t let me go, they poke and prod haunting my days until its done. People have said to me in the past “Michelle, you’re so lucky to have done the things you’ve done” The thing is, its never been about luck, its been about a list, hard work and a presence within my heart calling me to do what it is that I am supposed to do. I believe in having focus, questioning your life, taking risks, being scared, following your heart and then taking your children with you, this will teach your children to do all those things in their own life. Since I have had my children, they have become everything to me, filling me with so much love and hope but I also know that without loving and knowing myself, how can I be everything to them? How can I teach them to follow their dreams when I don’t follow my own? I want my children to have a desire to accomplish their dreams and have the knowledge within them to know that fear can never been an option and settling is a last resort. I have always believed in the energy that surrounds us. God places the curiosity in our heart and then waits for us to go after it and yet so many people don’t, they find the excuse not to (myself included). So many people make excuses about why they haven’t done this or that, why they are still stuck in that same old job, same old place but do nothing to change it. I want to scream at them and say, don’t you know that its all right in front of you? Everything you ever wanted? Everything you ever needed? Its all right there… Waiting for you to grasp it so that you can be the exact person you are meant to be. So what does this have to do with a Piano? This piano was something that someone no longer needed, something that some people have no desire to play, but it was placed in a random old house on an idle Saturday morning collecting dust and waiting for me to come and collect her. I knew the minute I saw the piano that God was giving me the means to cross that last thing off my list and quietly urging me to make a new one.
Learn to speak another language
Visit a Tropical Island
Become successful and more courageous with my photography
Get a written piece or a photograph published
Move home to America within the next few years
Take my children to New York City and if Im really lucky…. move back there.
Take a Ballet Class
Go on a yoga retreat in Bali
